Monday, March 18, 2013

Ode to Country Dancing

So I went country dancing last weekend.  It had been awhile.  I decided it would be fun to write a little blog post on it.  I've gone here and there throughout the years, and there always seems to be funny story telling moments.  And a little disclaimer to start with: I respect any guy who gets off the sidelines and asks girls to dance (unless you're the 50 year old) and I prefer to dance than sitting on the side lines.  So I may come off as a jerk, but...

10:30- Walk in and immediately notice this place fits in with the normal Provo 2:1 girl/guy ratio.  Awesome. Not.

11:00- I'm sure some stuff happened.  I don't really know the times and don't remember everyone I danced with.  Danced with a few people.

11:05- Finally danced with someone who was really good. But he liked to spin me.  I think once he figured out I could follow him he was spinning me all the time at triple speed.  Getting dizzy half way through the dance.  Brought memories back of one guy I danced with who was so impressed with my ability to spin.  He kept telling me "No, but you can like spin faster than any girl in this room."  Haha.  He spun me into dizziness oblivion too.  I think I could handle it better when I was more in my youth though.

11:07- Thankfully I get to sit this one out and get my balance back.

11:08 Unfortunately I'm standing next to a guy who looks like he's 50.  I spotted him before.  What is he doing here with a ton of college students?  Gross.  Creepy.  If you look older than my dad you should not be here.

11:09- He asks me to dance.  No!  Really?!  I get told on a weekly basis that I look like I'm still in high school.  If you're old enough to be my father you should not be here. I said this once before, but I thought it multiple times throughout the night. And if you come, you should bring an older woman.  I dance with him and feel awkward the whole time.

11:16- I don't notice the classic, short Mexican guy that's usually there.  You know the one.  He has danced with me and every one of my friends every time I've gone country dancing.  Kudos to him.  Now there is a new short Mexican guy here.  And he asks me to dance.  Only, I don't think he knows a thing about country dancing.  Maybe he missed the memo that it wouldn't be the salsa dancing that night.  We are swaying back and forth and he puts our hands high up in the air with every sway.  I'm not sure what we're doing--but it's definitely not country dancing--and I think we look completely ridiculous.

11:20- A guy walks in and my immediate thought is you look freakishly like a blonde version of Jordan Thompson from high school.  He comes and asks me to dance.  He exudes freshly being off a mission.  I'm thinking he's been back for like 2 weeks.  It's cute.  Then I think he also really looks like young Joseph from the Restoration movie.  Then he tells me his name...Joseph.  Kind of freaky, right? He dips me and I grab onto his bicep in the process and I notice he has nice muscles.  I immediately feel weird inside about that thought since I'm  dancing with a young Joseph Smith look alike.

11:25- There are a few guys who come in for there first time and I try and teach them a few moves, but it's been over a year since I've been...

11:30- I look over and spot my friend Laura dancing with a socially inept looking guy in his 30s.  He seems harmless though.  But it's an awkward slow dance.  There are worse things than sitting a dance out.

11:32- The 50 year old is staring my direction.  I try to avoid his gaze, but it's too late and he's coming over to me.  He asks me to dance.  Twice.  Does he know how creepy he is?  This ones a slow one.  Even worse.  Thankfully he does some country swing moves mixed in with the slow dancing.  But there was still time for some chit chat :(  For the most part I'm really happy with my life.  But every once in awhile there are moments like these that make me question why am I still single and dealing with this still.

11:35- Awkward but harmless guy who was dancing with my friend Laura asks me to dance.

11:40- Another line dance.  Why do they put so many in there anyway?  But this is one I've never seen before.  And it's awesome.  You just get to shake your butt around.  And that's something I can do and follow pretty easily.

11:45- I've been purposely avoiding eye contact with the 50 year old.  But he's heading my way again.  I can't do three times.  But boy in the green shirt swoops in and saves the day.  He asks me for a second dance right in the nick of time.  He does not know how happy I was to dance with him.  Laura was not so fortunate.  I notice her dancing with the 50 year old creeper.

11:47- I watch this random girl approach this random guy and ask him if he'll dance with her friend.  Then she brings him over to me.  What!?  We dance.  I tell him I've never actually talked to that girl in my life.  So weird.  Is this one of those social experiments for a psych class at BYU?

11:50- A really attractive guy comes and asks Laura to dance.  He's a really great dancer too.  Probably the hottest guy there.  Find out later that he's a player.  Oh, how it goes in Provo.

11:52- Random girl comes up to me and asks me how I liked my dance.  Really, who are you girl?

11:57- Last dance of the night.  The guy who likes to spin me a lot asks me to dance again.  He's the best dancer I've danced with all night, so it's a pretty good way to end the night.


I hope you enjoyed my night of country dancing as much as I did.  You probably enjoyed it more if you've been before and can relate to these stories:)